When will it arrive?
Salami Bouquet product has been discontinued
Alas, it is no more.
Why is this discontinued?
Al Gore, inventor of the Internet, was throwing a rollerskating disco inferno in our warehouse last night and decided to invent pocket-sized Man Crates by cutting into eighths our entire supply of Snack Sensei Crates.I don't believe you
In The Box
- Columbus Peppered Chub, 8 oz
- Columbus Sopressata Chub, 8 oz
- Columbus Calabrese Chub, 8 oz
- Columbus Chorizo Chub, 8 oz
- Columbus Italian Dry Chub, 8 oz
How It Ships
- Orders placed by noon PST will ship out same day
- Choose your delivery date at checkout
When the moon in the sky looks like meat that's been dried -- That's salami
When the waves of the sea smell of charcuterie -- That's salami
When your feelings are true and "just flowers" won't do -- That's salami
When your love for your hub leads to five tasty chubs -- That's salami!
Don't get us wrong, we're pro flowers! Flowers produce honey which makes the world and BBQ wings that much sweeter. Without flowers, the Rose Parade would just be another LA morning traffic jam. But rarely will flowers woo a man.
Some men are literally colorblind to the beauty of a bouquet. Other guys just aren't turned on by being handed yet another thing to try to keep alive. Since fresh-cut flowers don't cut it for men, we've made some delicious improvements to the traditional bouquet.
The Salami Snackphrodisiac
We began with the classic flower bouquet, then taste-tested and replaced every flower that wasn't of sufficient flavor with chunks of seasoned charcuterie. Before we knew it, all the flora was gone and five 8 oz. sticks of full-flavored salami remained. Success.
These seasoned salami sticks are attached to stems, wrapped as a bouquet, and hidden inside a boring, cliche flower box that can be delivered anywhere for a private or public declaration of delicious affection. It's a sensual salami surprise that is sure to kickstart full-scale romance.
When he peels back the wrap and his heart gives a clap -- That's salami
When the smell makes him drool like a love-bitten fool -- That's salami
When there's oil on your skin and a flirtatious grin -- That's salami
When the mood is just right and you snack through the night -- That's salami!
Mar 3rd 2019
A perfect gift for anyone that loves salami. The quality is excellent!
Feb 15th 2019
I had a salami bouquet scheduled to be delivered to my husband's work on Valentine's Day. Unfortunately FedEx delayed the shipment and he didn't receive it until the day after Valentine's. He did say the salami was very delicious and the packaging was great!!
Feb 15th 2019
My BF and I live 7 hours away from each other at the moment so I sent this to him for Vday. He was more worried about being embarrassed by coworkers and when it arrived he was so hallow with it and his coworkers (mostly male) was impressed and loved it also! It was a big hit and delish!
Feb 15th 2019
Boyfriend loved it!
Gave it to my boyfriend for Valentine's day and he loved it. Great gift!
Feb 14th 2019
This morning I put my bouquet of salami out for my sweetheart. At first he looked confused. When he opened it his eyes lite up and he had the biggest smile. He was so excited about his gift and loves it. Thank you man crate for making our day exciting. You have my business for life!