Bass Whisperer Crate

24 reviews

In The Box

Bass Traps

  • Top-water weed Pivot Frog or Spin-R-Bait
  • Mid-range Warpig
  • Shallow-water Pitbull
  • Trusty Worm Blower

Scaly Supplies

  • 6-pack Neoprene Insulated Cooler
  • Portable Dial Scale
  • Needlenose Pliers
  • Sunflower Seeds

How It Ships

In a sealed wooden crate with a laser-etched crowbar

  • Orders placed by noon PST will ship out same day
    Orders placed by noon PST will ship out same day
  • Choose your delivery date at checkout
    Choose your delivery date at checkout


One Fish, Two Fish, Impending Doom Fish

In all the years mankind has waded through water, no man, woman, or child has ever been eaten alive by bass—and we intend to keep it that way.

Bass are devious creatures, scheming insidiously in their watery depths. We don't know why they're so hell-bent on consuming human flesh or how they're melting the ice caps to sink our planet into their watery ambush. All we know is they're up to no good.

While we would never stoop to their lowly level by feasting on them, we want them to know we could. With every catch and release, we whisper in their scaly little fish ears, "Go tell your friends there's a new sheriff in town."

We are the Bass Whisperers, humanity's last line of defense against mass bass digestion.

Hook, Line, and Sucker

Power and precision are useless against these murderous sea-beasts. You can only catch a bass with a swift angling of poetic justice. This lure set capitalizes on the insatiable gluttony and cowardice of these greedy sons o' fishes by feigning helplessness, then executing a strong left jab with a sharp right hook.

The Pivot Frog tangoes sans-tangle in the top-water weeds, the Warpig emits a seductive Siren-song in the mid-range waters, and the Pitbull will skim scour the surface with the reckless fury of Liam Neeson if a largemouth bass had just kidnapped his daughter.

Nightcrawlers are usually easy-pickings due to their docile nature and lack of limbs, but give your worms the Schwarzenegger Treatment with a good, ol' fashion worm blower, and those pumped up water pythons will be armed with irresistible allure and unyielding strength.

Sentry of the Sea

The bass whisperer is a lonely, thankless role, but a band of bottles always make for good spirits. The neoprene-insulated cooler ensures your drinks stay as cold as the blood coursing through your veins.

Eternal vigilance is the cost of liberty. Equip your vessel to record the growth of these water-breathing death bringers: a portable dial scale for science reasons and a good pair of needlenose pliers, because they don't need to keep the hook to get the point.

Keep your loved ones safe and those savage bass at bay with the Bass Whisperer Crate.

Customer Reviews

    Feb 16th 2018
    Neat idea but way over priced

    I received this for v-day and was excited to see what it was! I opened it and went through the items and was honestly disapointed, especially when I found out the price. I feel like you're taking advantage over women buying this - I mean who packed this? I could go to the store and load up on actual fishing supplies for 90 bucks.

    I feel like this would have been GREAT if it were loaded with lures, hooks, plastics, the scale, and maybe a reel of some sort.

    Sunflower seeds were a kicker, really?

    Anyways, I'll keep because it's the "thought" that counts.

    Good day

    Feb 15th 2018
    The “Bass Master” loved the Bass Whisperer

    I purchased this crate with the additional duct tape for my husband for Valentine’s Day. The crate came on time and wrapped with care. When I gave the gift to my husband who calls himself the “Bass Master” he was ecstatic. While opening it he kept saying “no sh**?, bad a**, this is cool, hell yeah”... etc. I can tell you in previous attempts over the last 8 years he has never been that excited or happy over a gift. Additionally, he thought the gift was an awesome idea and very thoughtful. I will be a repeat customer!

    Lyssette Williams
    Feb 14th 2018
    It was a bust...

    When my husband saw that it was wrapped in duct tape he took a knife to it and opened it like it was any other package. He didn’t struggle at all to unwrap it, big disappointment. He thought it was cute that it was in the wooden box and there was a little crowbar but he did not struggle at all to open that either, which was very disappointing to me as well. The fishing lures he said were worth $10 if that and that the crate basically was not worth what I paid for it. You could tell that he was fake excited about it only because I had made such a big deal about the gift before I got here. We will not be returning it just because he wants to spare my feelings but it’s definitely something I will not be buying again.

    Dan Jones
    Jan 26th 2018

    Received from my partners as i was departing for 6 weeks of fishin, golfin & relaxin in Marco Island. Great gift but i hope the video of trying to open from the top is lost. Secret is try the bottom. Roll Tide Champion.

    Hanna Martens
    Oct 12th 2017
    The Perfect Gift

    I got this for my boyfriend, who is a great bass fisherman, loved the challenge of opening this crate. Everything inside was exactly what he liked and needed.

100% Satisfaction Guaranteed

Learn More

No man has ever gotten an artful arrangement of fruit and said "Holy moly, it's exactly what I wanted!"