Since the dawn of time, man has waged an endless, often futile war…with facial hair. The battle rages on and questions remain, such as why do men even have this hair and why does it keep coming back? Science has not given us enough answers. But that doesn’t mean we can’t provide some of the finest shaving solutions known to man. Here are Man Crates, we are not just your go-to source for great gifts for men, we are your shaving sensei.
Here’s a less abridged version of shaving history…
30,000 BC: Man begins to use flint blades (aka sharp rocks) to shave. Though painful, it becomes a welcome morning diversion from having to deal with the kids.
2,000 BC: Ancient Egyptians come to believe body hair is unseemly and unclean and usher in a golden age of shaving. However, they take it a little too far, start shaving their cats and generally just get weird about it.
330 BC: Alexander the Great’s clean-shaven look is a hit across Europe and Asia. Gazing at his majestic bone structure becomes one of the few upsides to being conquered by Greece.
500-1500: The Dark Ages are also a dark time for shaving. Ridiculously long beards reign supreme. Did not shaving lead to the Bubonic Plague? No one knows for sure.
1680: The first straight razor is manufactured in England. The number of bearded men across the globe is reduced while facial cuts increase by 9,000 percent. Women everywhere say “Wait, that’s what your face looks like? Oh no.”
1903: Gillette introduces the first disposable razor, the Safety Razor. It has one blade. LOL.
1930: The first electric razor is patented by Schick. Everyone wonders where that buzzing sound is coming from.
1983: ZZ Top’s Eliminator album debuts. Shaving industry conflicted by their tasty blues riffs and disgusting beards.
2016: Man Crates unveils the Clean Shave Crate. Equipped with an old school badger brush, heavy-weight chrome razor, exquisite soaps and soothing after-shave lotion, the perfect shave is finally achieved.
The average man will shave for roughly 3,000 hours during his life (source: Shaving Illustrated). And unlike most menial tasks like driving and mowing the lawn, you can’t mail it in or look at your cell phone while doing it. So, it makes sense to make it as enjoyable experience as possible, does it not? Here are six quick Pro Tips for a better shave.
1) Make sure the beard/stubble is suitably wet: This is a common rookie mistake. Also be sure the water is warm. Shaving cold and/or dry is like staring directly at the sun. It burns and you will feel foolish afterwards.
2) Don’t skimp on the shaving cream: Cheap shaving cream is another leading contributor to dreaded razor burn. The good news is, high-quality shaving lotions aren’t that pricey.
3) Use a shaving brush. Not only does a shaving brush make you feel like an old-timey, Wild West sheriff, but it’s also better for the skin. The lather from the brush raises the hair follicles, making them easier to remove.
4) Shave in the right direction. This means the direction the beard/stubble is growing in. Also, save the chin for last. It’s the toughest part, so you want the soap to really soak in there. Ignore your temptation to grow a Van Dyke.
5) Don’t be afraid of the straight edge: The old-school straight edge, like our Boker Classic can be intimidating, but fear not. It delivers the closest shave humanly possible.
6) Remember the aloe. Many men don’t use aftershave because of the fear of the intense pain of slapping on that lotion and feeling the burn. Luckily, we have just instructed you how to avoid all those burns. You’re good to go!
Bonus tip: Do not ever attempt to shave in an airplane bathroom. Remember what happened to the poorguy in Airplane 2.