Fall means two things: Criticizing your friends who order Pumpkin Spice Lattes and SHARKTOBER. We’ve waited patiently all year, and it’s finally our monthlong chance to appreciate the lion of the sea, the Obama of the ocean, the sultan of the saltwater with our Shark Power Rankings.
In October, great white sharks have just finished an insane 5,000-mile migration and they’re arriving on the West Coast shores at places like Ano Nuevo Island, between San Francisco and Santa Cruz, or the Farallon Islands, which is just off the coast of San Francisco. The behemoths finally have a little time to chill...so you can generally find them snuggling up to surfers, eating organic, seaweed-fed seal, and holding contests to see who can hold their breath out of water longest. A few weeks ago, Surfline even caught an epic Great White breaching near San Franscisco .
In honor of this great month, we took some time away from our tireless product testing (read: eating jerky and playing with hunting gear) to come up with Shark Power Rankings.
SHARK POWER RANKINGS
1. Happy shark
A happy shark is the best shark, as they say. This type of beast enjoys sunny days, a nice cheese platter, and LOVES that new Bruno Mars single. When they aren’t posing for pictures, you can find happy sharks reenacting the closing scene to Free Willy by leaping over smiling children at the local jetty.
2. Piggyback Shark
Have you ever driven a wave runner? Have you ever felt the amazing rush of the wind flowing through your hair as you slice up the crisp blue water? Well, that’s just a warm-up for piggyback shark. Find one of these guys to get a free ride around the ocean, waving at the lesser fish as you glide by. They love it when you pet their fin.
3. Anxiety Shark
Sharks get nervous! You would too if every surfer tried to punch you in the nose just because they “read it on Google.” Sharks like this guy mean well, but they ultimately don’t love the outside ocean. They just want a nice night at home, maybe a glass of Pinot and the latest Grisham novel.
4. Pool shark
5. Curmudgeon Shark
These sharks are the ones you avoid; the ones who can’t see the joy in the world; the ones who turn their lights off on Halloween. You can usually find them at the local rock cave, muttering something under their breath about the “good ol’ days” and decrying the “entitled sharks in this current generation who think everything should just be handed to them.”
Lastly, do you know someone who has just made a new shark friend? Is this man-animal duo trying to forge their unlikely friendship through a series of trust-building activities? We have the perfect idea: fishing! And Man Crates even offers a gift to let the shark know mankind has their back.
Bass Whisperer Crate
It’s all here for the serious fisherman. Spin’R’ Bait, worm blower, scale, pliers, and an insulated cooler (in case your shark is legal age). He does the casting and the shark provides the underwater intel.