Let’s face it. Guys are pretty awful at anniversaries. Not remembering until 3:42 pm the day of. Kicking up a cartoon-like cloud of dust as they scramble to find a last-minute gift. Then failing miserably to play it off like they had it all perfectly planned all along. No one is buying it.
But can you really blame them? When the grand tradition of the anniversary began in the times of the Roman Empire, it was called vicennalia, which may or may not loosely translate to “you’re stepping on my toga.” Those were much simpler times. Men were only on the hook for two gifts per marriage: A silver wreath on the 25th anniversary and a gold upgrade on the 50th. That explains why men aren’t hardwired to keep up with the modern-day ritual of bestowing gifts upon their spouses on an annual basis.
Wives and girlfriends, take heed. If you’re not being spoiled like a Roman empress, you have options. Much like Rome’s Via Veneto, anniversary gifting is a two-way street. And great opportunity lies in the gift you choose. To that end, we give you our list of anniversary gifts for him—that ultimately benefit her.
You know what makes breakfast the most important meal of the day? The Morning Glory Crate. He’ll love the cast-iron bacon press, metal egg rings and protein-packed Flapjack and Waffle Mix. You’ll love when he puts it to good use with a breakfast in bed or three.
We’re pretty sure whoever said “looks aren’t everything” wasn’t married to a fitness model. Shirt on, your guy may still look like a hot commodity. But what if his rad bod is taking a slight turn toward dad bod? Not to worry. The SKLZ on-the-go workout equipment and Hammer Nutrition supplement starter kit have the power to bring back the six pack.
Love when he grows a beard? Whether he skews rugged, retro or hipster, this’ll cultivate the coarsest of facial hair situations. Renegade Beard Shampoo Bar, Beard Balm and Beard Oil will keep the weird out of his beard.
Hate when he grows a beard? Don’t give him the brush off. Give him the brush and blades to turn that stubbly mug into the silky smooth face you fell in love with. The Clean Shave Crate also sets him up for success with Imperial Pre-Shave Oil and finishes strong with Bergamot Aftershave.
Too much man/couch bonding? Perk him up with an 8-cup enamel percolator, personalized stainless steel mugs and some Peerless Extra Dark French Roast. He’ll be chomping at the bit for a little gardening, a brisk walk around the neighborhood and whatever errands need running.
Help him raise the “bar” in barbecue with a brass-knuckle meat tenderizer, a cast-iron smoker box, spices, sauces and everything else he needs to achieve smoky grilling perfection. Then relax. You won’t need to be in charge of meal planning anytime soon.
The classiest way to loosen up any tight-lipped man. Pour his bourbon of choice into a heavy-bottom rocks glass gloriously adorned with his name. As the ice sphere slowly melts, he’ll start opening right up like a tulip in full bloom.
Has he been putting honey-do list items on hold because he doesn’t have the right tools? You can fix that. So he can fix anything. The Magnogrip Wristband hammers home unprecedented organization, while the Sheffield 4-in-1 Lighted Screwdriver lets him tighten screws 24/7.
On behalf of the team here at Man Crates, we genuinely hope your next anniversary includes a timely, thoughtful anniversary gift from the man in your life. If not, you’ll just have to reap the benefits of what you give him. Whichever gift he uncrates, we promise to keep the ulterior motives mentioned here between us.
Oh, and if, by chance, you’re celebrating your fifth anniversary, that’s known in as the wood anniversary, which calls for gifts made out of wood. Dozens of our gifts for men come in wood crates. Just sayin’.